Will NASA Pay For My Student Loans?

The Houston Chronicle reports today that Space Center Houston (a non-profit organization that is “connected” with NASA) is presenting NASA with Luke Skywalker’s original lightsaber from the 1977 original Star Wars film so that it can be taken into space with Space Shuttle Discovery’s next mission.

Is this a joke?  Am I living in a cartoon?  In the photograph in the paper there are 4 or 5 individuals dressed as stormtroopers and Bobba Fett escorting the expensive briefcase carrying the (fake) lightsaber, which by the way is also called a movie prop.  I don’t know if NASA is paying (which means you are paying) for this bizarre media stunt but someone is paying.  My guess is that if the government is involved at all, the entire event (rental costumes, salaries, briefcase, etc..) is about $40-$50K.  So I want to publicly offer my services to both NASA and Space Center Houston.

I have some law school loans that I would love to get rid of so for $40K I will do any of the following:

1.  Dress up like Jabba The Hut and slither all over Space Center Houston signing autographs for 4 straight weekends.

2.  Bring Capt. Kirk’s cool flip phone in a brief case to NASA dressed as one of the expendable “red guys” from Star Trek.

3.  Cover myself in brown Playdough and ride a small bike around the launch pad exclaiming “phone home” for the 2 hours prior to the next lift off.

4.  Help build a monolith at Space Center Houston and then dress like an ape and dance around it for 2-3 hours.

5.  Attend the next Star Trek convention and force myself to stay there all day.

6.  Eat some Bantha Fodder.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Star Wars films, but seriously as stewards of money can’t we spend it on something a little more worth while, you know like maybe subsidizing bee farmers or paying for a haircut for John Edwards?  After all, we all know that the government is a better steward of our money than we are–that is why they take it from us and spend it so wisely.

May the Force be With You!, Nanu Nanu! and Live Long and Prosper!

 -Murphy

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