Archive for the ‘Health Care’ category

Obama’s Mystique Not Dead Yet!

March 5, 2008

Tonight I found myself living through a voluntary nightmare.  You know, like when you eat a health bar because its good for you.  Normally in life you would never consider sticking something in your mouth that tasted like a cross between gravel and rodent droppings, but you do it because its “healthy.”  Or when you sit through a 4 hour dance recital because your daughter has a 5 minute part in the dance that is demonically scheduled 2nd to last on the program.  (I digress)

 Yes, tonight I found myself cheering on (I can barely even type it)-Hillary Clinton!

She kind of looks like my fourth grade teacher here–Sister Theresa–yeesh!

I know, I may have to change the name of this blog now-dadgumit. 

But I must confess, after studying the “platforms” of both democrats, I am much more fearful of a Barack Hussein Obama Presidency than a Hillary Clinton Co-Presidency.  At least with Hillary there will be scandals to keep Congress occupied and then maybe they won’t have time to raise our taxes.

But, the “magic” is not over–Barack stated a few minutes ago that he would still have the same number of delegates more than Hillary regardless of the outcome of Texas.  (sounds like fuzzy math to me)

So, I continue to be worried–not enough to do something crazy like vote in the Democrate primary just to vote against him–no, no.  I tried to walk into the Democratic side of the primary and my skin began to melt so I quickly retreated.  But we must all worry–Barack-who has no experience, no real knowledge of foreign policy and no muscles (literally) has some really far out ideas.  Well, he really isn’t that liberal, I mean after all he only has the following stands on issues:

1.  He voted against a ban on partial birth abortions–so he is okay with killing babies–seems progressive.

2. He voted “NO” on forcing minors to inform parents before obtaining out-of-state abortions.–I mean really, 15 year old pregnant girls are very discerning–they don’t need any guidance.

3. He wants to regulate financial instruments to protect home mortgages.  After all when someone buys a home they can’t afford-they shouldn’t have to lose it to foreclosure–the rich can bail them out because they already have a big house.

4. He equates the gay rights movement to the civil rights movement.  “I have a dream, where people are not judged by the color of their skin or the gender of their sexual partner….”

5.  He smoked and inhaled in high school and college.  That experience only enhances his magic power.

6. Katrina Contracts should go to locals, not Halliburton.  That’s right-because New Orleans contractors are awesome–just look at the great job they did building that levy.

7. We must Reduce Obesity.  Well that’s easy for him to say–he weighs like 80 lbs.

8.  Minorities need more health care coverage.  Because they get sicker?  What the Crud is he talking about here? 

9.  Tax cuts for the rich do not create jobs.  Maybe not–but overtaxing them does cause layoffs–but then he wouldn’t know about that–because he IS rich.

If you would like to see a full list of his beliefs–check it out at

As of now–this site is officially a full blooded, hard working, no nonsense-McCain for President site–he is the best democrat running.

-Murphy Political Blogger Alliance

Ralph Nader For President-Finally the Democrats Have a Choice!

February 24, 2008

He finally did it.  He announced he is running for the highest office in the land.  And good for you Ralph–this is what makes America great.  Besides, this gives people a real choice.

So who is this Democrat-spoiler anyway?  Here are some of the issues he supports:

1. He wants a single payer National Health Insurance Plan–excellent–one small step for Nader, one giant step towards Socialism.

2. He wants to severely cut the military budget–excellent–we are tired of being the dominant military force on the planet–let’s let Iran or Korea have a turn–or better yet–China.

3. He wants to create legislation that MANDATES the use of solar energy over nuclear energy.  I suppose it will suck when it rains–but hey, only some of us live in Seattle anyway–Arizona will become the energy capital of the country.

4. He wants Bush and Cheney impeached.–Yawn!  This sour grapes business over Clinton’s impeachment is sooooooo played and tiresome.

5. He wants to adopt a carbon pollution tax.  No more Ranch Style Beans for me then, I’m not paying a tax every time I have to “let one go.”

6.  He wants to put an end to “ballot access obstructionsim.”  (i.e.–he wants dead people to be able to vote again)

 7. He wants to “reverse U.S. Policy in the Middle East”–um, and so…then I guess we would pull out our troops, allow dictatorships to run rampant again and appease them at all costs because after all–we don’t need their stinkin’ oil anymore anyway–see #3 above.

8.  He is totally Pro-Choice, supports free access to the “morning after pill” and thinks that the Reproductive Vigillantes of NOW are correct in their thinking.  So I wonder if he would put another Scalia on the Supreme Court?  I guess one of his campaign posters could say “Vote Nader:  Death to the Babies”–kinda harsh, sorry.

This is just some of the glorious fun Ralph has planned for us.

So here are my Top 10 reasons why you should vote for Ralph Nader (if you are a Democrat only):

1.  A vote for Ralph is not a vote for Obama or Clinton–and it is about as valuable as making Scooby-Doo 3.

2.  We can all finally start riding around in these new Government Mandated solar cars.

3.  He wants women to succeed better in athletics.


4.  He thinks citizens should be able to sue the government for wasteful spending–not a bad idea–then 1000’s of crazies will keep the government embroiled in legal battles (which is a fine use of our tax money by the way) and the government won’t have time to further destroy our lives.

5. He Supports getting rid of gun ownership.  That way we will no longer have to worry about our neighbors–unless of course they are criminals.

6. He beats John McCain in “oldest candidate” category by one year.

7. He wants to solve the Palestinian-Israeli conflict.  What a great idea!  I can’t believe that it hasn’t been considered before.  It seems like such an easy solution.

8. Supports a minimum wage of at least $10.  Thank goodness, I’m so sick of paying $3.00 for a hamburger–I’m ready to pay more.  Plus, then there will be no more jobs that Americans are unwilling to do and he will single-handedly solve immigration as well–brilliant!

9. He grew up in Winstead, CT–where everyone walked–Oh, the Good ‘ole Days when we didn’t drive places and see the world.

10.  No one voting Republican will vote for him–which gives us hope.

Thanks Ralph,  thanks a bunch!

-Murphy Political Blogger Alliance

Help Me Congress, I’m Fat and It is Causing the World To Get Warmer!

February 20, 2008


Is there anyone out there that doesn’t think that obesity is a health problem?

(crickets, wind, silence)

Of course not, we all know that–and yet, many of us are obese.  And let’s not dance around with terms like “full figured” and “Just My Size” let’s just call it as it is–FAT.  We as a nation are Fat.  And why are we Fat?  (and no, I’m not going to digress into a metaphor using PHAT).

Well, there are some people that are fat because of medications they are taking or genetic disorders.  The National Institute of Health states that these reasons for obesity are rare.  The health risks of obesity are in part:

 Obesity has been linked to several serious medical conditions, including diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and stroke. It is also associated with higher rates of certain types of cancer. Obese men are more likely than nonobese men to die from cancer of the colon, rectum, and prostate. Obese women are more likely than nonobese women to die from cancer of the gallbladder, breast, uterus, cervix, and ovaries.

Other diseases and health problems linked to obesity include:

  • Gallbladder disease and gallstones.
  • Osteoarthritis, a disease in which the joints deteriorate, possibly as a result of excess weight on the joints.
  • Gout, another disease affecting the joints
  • Pulmonary (breathing) problems, including sleep apnea, in which a person can stop breathing for a short time during sleep.

And we know this to be true already don’t we?  And yet, we are still fat.  In 2003, my fair city of Houston was dubbed the fattest city in America for the 3rd YEAR IN A ROW!!!  And yes we are fat.

So what makes us fat?  Well, I think even a Kindergarten child could tell us that FOOD makes us fat.  Really good food like McDonald’s fries and Ice Cream and Chocolate (but not dark chocolate–say it isn’t so) and alcohol and Funnel Cakes and Oreos and Pizza and Pasta and Steak and and and and and…

  (Yummy)The real problem is not the food itself necessarily but the amount that we consume.

But wait, there is an answer–a light at the end of the Taco Bell, a beacon of hope shining through the golden arches–it is:  THE INTERNATIONAL OBESITY TASK FORCE

It’s stated mission:  “to inform the world about the urgency of the problem and to persuade governments that the time to act is now.”

Hmmmmm….  So it wants to influence governments to act on obesity.  Do wha?  Hasn’t the government already acted–after all we have nutritional labels mandated by law on all food items that are not fresh produce or meats, we have the FDA that is allegedly testing the chemicals in processed foods and reporting on their effects on the body.  What more can the government do to help us poor fat people.  After all, isn’t what I eat my… what is that liberal word used in another context…what is it…oh yeah.. my CHOICE?

According to its website the IOTF is “now working to convince world leaders that something can be done to address the problem.”  But what?  I mean look at these guys–not much being done to convince them:


 Barney (not the dinasour variety)

 Might explain why he feels hot all the time.

On Sunday Speaking to the annual meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science in Boston, Prof Philip James said that obesity must be tackled in the same way as climate change with world leaders agreeing to vital steps to transform the environment that is making us fat.

Oh, so we should have washed up Presidential hopefuls do a docu-fiction movie on the effects of obesity and how we should all be scared to death of it.  How exactly is the environment making us fat?  We don’t all live in a Willy Wonka Factory do we?

Ah, but wait–here is the real reason this is being addressed–not because anyone cares about obesity but because of–you guessed it–GLOBAL WARMING.  I’m not crazy–it may seem I am but check out this quote from the Boston meeting on Sunday:

“Much of the present high calorie density food production has a massive carbon footprint and requires wasteful amounts of energy and water. If we are to feed the world – 8 billion people in just 20 years time – with a healthy diet, we need to deliver a rescue plan for the planet – not just to address global warming, but to ensure we have sufficient healthy food to feed everyone.”

Yep, there it is–obesity is now the 1,589,332nd link to global warming, right behind cow farts and tootsie rolls.  Making high calorie food has a “massive carbon footprint”–are you kidding me?  I’m sure finding new ways to crush a soy bean into a food and call it chocolate takes no energy at all though.

In case you are not convinced that there are a group of people in the world that want to make all of your Choices (except abortion of course) for you–read on:

“The strategic approaches needed involve rejecting the misplaced notion that the obesity problem is merely a matter of individual choice. Blaming individuals for their personal vulnerability to weight gain is no longer acceptable in a world where the majority is already overweight and obesity is rising everywhere. It is naïve of ill-informed politicians and food industry executives to place the onus on individuals making ‘healthier choices’ whilst the environment in which we live is the overwhelming factor amplifying the epidemic.”

It apparently is now naive to think that anyone is smart enough or able on their own to quit pounding down 12 Krispy Kremes each morning for breakfast because after all–those “Hot Donuts” signs are just too enticing and we are soooooo very weak, so weak.


And because parents are too stupid to regulate what their children eat, the great professor stated that governments should regulate and control subliminal advertising of junk foods.  That’s it, no more Mr. Kool-aid.


Um, hello, but aren’t the parents buying the food–not the kids.  And so, are the parents then so enticed by the “subliminal” advertising of a giant pitcher of sugary drink busting through a wall of bricks?  Well–as all liberals believe–we are a stupid, fat bunch of idiots aren’t we?


He concludes by saying if we fail to act soon it will be too late–too late for what?  Are we all going to collectively cause the United States to sink into the ocean because of our collective bad choices?


I understand obesity is a problem–I think about it everytime I see Hillary in a tight skirt-but the reality is this–the food we eat is one of the few choices that the government has not taken from us–if we want to eat poorly and be fat–that is our choice–the righteous government has no right to tell us otherwise.  But as I stated before, this is not about being fat–it is about cooling our environment because we all know that healthy foods do so well in the cold.


-Murphy Political Blogger Alliance

Time To Tax The Babies–Put Down That Rattle and Pay Up!

December 11, 2007

Thank heaven for Australia.  Without that little island we would be without so much.  Here are some little known facts about Austrailia.  In 1856 they were the first place in the world to have secret ballot elections.  In 1894 they were the first place in the world to give women the right to vote.  They are the only country to attend every modern Olympic games.  They inveted the bionic ear, flexible wine casks, boomerangs, the Notepad, the electric drill, postage stamps, the first “bathing beauty contest” (in 1920), the automatic letter sorting maching, the two stroke lawn mower and best of all…Latex gloves. 

And now, at the forefront of modern history, on the edge of innovation and ingenuity, they have come up with a brilliant idea to help achieve Al Gore’s vision of the World.  A World where we don’t burn fuel, or exhale or burp or use hairspray or freon or any other modern convenience.   The Australians have decided to tax babies to save our planet.  Yes, that’s right–babies–those little mooching, slobbering, dependent, whiny piles of human fat barely formed into a recognizable human–babies.

The article above states that couples with more than 2 children “should be charged a lifelong tax to offset their extra offspring’s carbon dioxide emissions”  according to a medical expert.  The report in an Austrailian medical journal (yes a MEDICAL journal) says that parents should be “charged $5000 a head for every child after their second AND an annual tax of up to $800.” 

Here at Murphy’s Conservative Blog we have found an exclusive picture of the doctor who authored this article:

  Here he is preparing the altar of healing for a poor woman who believes she is the virgin Mary.  The potion will help extract the baby blue blanket from her body and reveal that she is in fact not the virgin Mary but instead is:

gyrrjdcao272bccadrlwpgcaszbmzrca0kxdtocax81ud2ca0wssjyca5hblbzca6q0al3caqhldsrcaw4qxg3ca6n5lvmcaqs1wybcae2kvv5ca82hbr9cao1ideacam8v52rcaqne0gmcawjmqyucailjy42.jpeg Jennifer Love-Hewitt.

 In any event, the good doctor continues and states that “couple who were sterilized would be eligible for carbon credits.”  Which is a nice bonus to the old snip-snip don’t you think.  I recently used my carbon credits to purchase a giant poster of a windbag:

  It is hanging in my room with ticky-tack made of carbon fuel emissions.  I’m soooo doing my part.

 An Austrialian obstetrician named Barry Walters said that “Every family choosing to have more than a defined number of children should be charged a carbon tax that would fund the planting of enough trees to offset the carbon cost generated by a new human being.”

He is so right–for example, when my third child was born I noticed that he used up 8-10 diapers a day in the first month.  Each time filing it with a mixture of substances that smelled a little like death on a stick.  I felt so bad about putting those bags of filth outside that I paid my neighbor some money as a way of seeking forgiveness for the extra carbon load.  Oddly though, the tree next to the trash can grew 3 feet that month.  Hmmmmm….

“As citizens of the world, I believe we deserve no more population concessions than those in India or China.”  says Professor Walters.    Good take Prof–in China there is rampant forced abortion and infanticide.  So I guess that is what would be considered a “population concession.”

Garry Eggers, director of the NSW Centre for Health Promotion and Research, agreed with the call, saying former treasurer Peter Costello’s request for three children per family – “one for mum, one for dad and one for the country” – was too single-minded.   He thinks this debate should be “reopened as part of a second ecological revolution.”  I missed the first–dang it–sequels are never any good when you miss the original.

I have 3 kids so I guess I’d be subject to this tax if I was there.  But really this is a sexist move on the part of Austrailia–everyone knows that boys emit WAY more carbon than girls so it is not fair for girls to be assessed the same tax.  Although, girls do spend a lot more on personal grooming devices and creams etc… that may impact the environment. 

 Since I was suspicious of this article I thought it best to find the other authors and see why they might be so biased.

Here is Gary Eggers:

 19.jpeg  He has spent 29 years with Gearhart Chevrolet.  Founded by Frank C. Gearhart in 1929, Gearhart is one of America’s longest-established dealerships.  It is located in Denville, New Jersey.   I find it odd that a car dealer from Jersey would also be the director of the NSW Centre for Health Promotion and Research–but I’m betting the real Garry Eggers is as qualified as this fine man here to handle such a post.

Since this is likely NOT the actual Garry Eggers from Austrailia I kept looking…Finally I found him–it was hard because he is kind of camera shy but here he is the Director himself:

  He was quoted as saying, “Two babies is plenty, it is impossible to imagine someone having 3 babies, each worthy of citizenship in Austrailia.  After all, we invented the boomerrang!”

-Let me make a suggestion–I’ll give each contributor to the article cited above $5000 if they turn in their respective licenses and shut up for the rest of their natural lives.  That should reduce carbon emissions so much that every tree in Austrailia will die.


Merry Banned Christmas

November 26, 2007

Well it is now officially “Holiday Season.”  Time to spend a lot of money on gifts, make well-intentioned purchases of flour, sugar, chocolate chips and sprinkles for the cookies you didn’t have time to make in July and certainly don’t have time to make now.  Time to try and figure out which family you will visit and on what day and whether it is worth it to shun one on the 25th for the other or try and swing by both ( or all 4 if both parents are split and remarried). 

But the best part of the Holiday Season is the banning.  That’s right, the annual excitement that comes about now when various groups send out their “banned” list for one reason or another.  Now, personally, I’m not into banning too much, although I do not contribute to non-profits that support abortion for example, and I try not to shop at retailers that openly hate Billy Joel.  But beyond that it is too hard for me to keep up.

 For example–last year I was told to ban Wal-Mart because of its tolerant pro-gay stance on various gay issues.  Apparently an Ohio woman quit last year when she discovered that Wal-Mart contributed to something called the “gay” chamber of commerce.  (???)  This year USA TODAY reports (Gay Rights Group Raises Red Flag on Wal-Mart Policies) that “The Human Rights Campaign, the nation’s largest gay rights group, is giving Wal-Mart a red ‘do not buy’ rating in its new consumer guide” because of its “refusal to offer domestic partner benefits to its gay and lesbian workers.”  So what do I do?  Do I shop there to support gay agendas or do I shop there to show my support for anti-gay agendas? I’m so confused by it all–I feel kind of like this guy/gal:


Then there was/is the whole “Merry Christmas” scandal.  Last year Wal-Mart made news again by “bringing back”  “Merry Christmas” to their stores.   In 2005, the American Family Association called for a ban on Wal-Mart for purposely striking the phrase from its stores.  So if I shop at Wal-Mart now I think what I’m doing is showing my support for the expression of the Christian Holiday, the refusal of the chain to support homosexual marriage/union and for being pro-gay.  What??? 

So, over some excellent tryptophans (for the Democrat voting base–that’s the stuff that makes you feel all funny from eating Turkey), I came up with my own list of things to ban this “Holiday” season. 

NUMBER ONE:  Stupid Gifts.  All gifts that come under this category should be banned forever by all people.  If I get one of these gifts I will either cry, scream or fly into rage.  This is a broad category but here are a few “picks.”

a.  The gift that says–“You obvioulsy don’t know a darn thing about personal grooming so here-try this you idiot.”

b.      The gift that says, “Hey I was walking through a mall when I saw this kiosk and thought, I don’t have a thing for Sally and I don’t care enough about her to find out what she really wants–everyone has to eat, so….”


 The gift that says “I actually hate your freaking guts.”


   The gift that says, ” I don’t believe you have the social grace necessary to eat anywhere that has a linen napkin.”

 e.     (Slippers)–The gift that says, ” I secretly hope the rest of the kids in the neighborhood beat your kid to a bloody pulp.”

NUMBER TWO: Overused Sayings.  There are certain sayings that people are currently using that must stop–I propose a total ban on the following:

a.   “Oh Snap”  Thanks Disney Channel for this idiotic saying and also thanks to some rapper named Biz Markie.

b.  “Oh no you didn’t”–he “did,” get over it.

c.  “What’s up dog?”–Just because the guy on American Idol says it doesn’t make it “cool.”

d.  “Irregardless”–THIS IS NOT A WORD!!!

e.  “LMAO, LOL, BFF, etc…”   Seriously…

f.  “Seriously” and referring to anyone as “Mc” something–Grey’s Anatomy is not real–it is a television show.

NUMBER THREE:  Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.  Enough already–I don’t care how many kids she or he or they adopt or whether she won’t speak to Jennifer Aniston or whether he is running around on her or whether she is appearing before Congress or anything else–Don’t Us  and People and all the others have something else to write about?  Oh yeah–they do–Brittney Spears–Enough of that too.    However–this might be an evil way to not accept 2 of these proposed bans:


  I endured this show for reasons I really can’t say only to see him choose neither woman.  Now, don’t get me wrong–if there isn’t true love then …. oh what am I saying–the reason we watch the show is so that he can pick someone and finally Us and People can write about the scandals involving someone other than those mentioned in NUMBER THREE.  Thanks ABC, you ruined our fall.

NUMBER FIVE:  SPEEDOS  There is only one kind of person anyone wants to see in one of these.

From this picture can you guess which one we would rather see dressed that way?

Okay, on that note I have to stop–my sausage and cheese breakfast that I got from my Hickory Farms gift set is coming up.


The Argument For Bigger Government Control of Our Lives! Chapter 1

October 8, 2007

I’ve decided to run a weekly story regarding why the Government would be the best entity to run various aspects of our lives.  Since many seem to indicate that they will be voting Democrat “no matter what” next election because Bush lied, and Bush hates children, and because Halliburton caused Hurricane Katrina, etc…., I thought I would enlighten you on some stories about our Government at work that you may not have heard about.  This will include State, Local and Federal Government stories.  Today’s Feature–The Alabama State Education System:

“Zero Tolerance” Is Just for the Kids: One Alabama teacher, already fired but awaiting trial on a charge of raping a student, has not only received his regular paychecks for nearly two years, and will continue to until the trial is over, but has also been awarded two routine raises, based on a 2004 state law boosting teachers’ rights (according to an August Associated Press review of records). [Mobile Register-AP, 8-12-07]

See imagine how glorious it would be if the same people making the decision to continue paying this teacher and giving her “lock-step” raises (yes, I said “lock-step”) was also the person in charge of scheduling your much anticipated Kidney surgery.  After 2 years of waiting for your turn, you finally get to the hospital, nearly dead from Kidney failure only to have the doctor accidentally remove your ovaries because the scheduling person was just too dadgum lazy to get it right. 

Free Enterprise is sooooooo overrated, don’t you think?


Who Needs Parents If We Have Hillary Clinton?

September 28, 2007

Today it was reported that Senator Clinton thinks it would be a “good idea” for the government to hand out $5K bonds to every baby born in the United States.  See Story:

 WASHINGTON (AP) – Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton said Friday that every child born in the United States should get a $5,000 “baby bond” from the government to help pay for future costs of college or buying a home. Clinton, her party’s front-runner in the 2008 race, made the suggestion during a forum hosted by the Congressional Black Caucus. “I like the idea of giving every baby born in America a $5,000 account that will grow over time, so that when that young person turns 18 if they have finished high school they will be able to access it to go to college or maybe they will be able to make that downpayment on their first home,” she said. The New York senator did not offer any estimate of the total cost of such a program or how she would pay for it. Approximately 4 million babies are born each year in the United States.

So, based on what she said would a person have to graduate high school to get the money? What happens if the child dies before they turn 18?  What happens if the child gets a GED?  What happens if we can’t pay for it—well she isn’t too worried about that because the first payout would be in 2026–well after she is gone from office. I think Hillary is short-changing herself here–after all she has always believed that the Government should take care of us like parents so how about this idea expanding on hers:

When every child is born the government can give them the $5K bond and the following other items:

1.  A pre-designated funeral plot with a bond to cover expenses

2. Of course, free health care forever

3. A pre-determined spouse so that they child will not have to go through the pain of dating and forming a real relationship.

4. Clothing voucher for a budgeted amount of clothing each year.

5. A grocery store pass that will allow the parents to get free baby food and a graduated amount of free food as the child gets older.

6. A piece of property-owned by the government of course, but saved for his/her use to build a habitat for humanity house on when he/she is older.

7. A set of books on how wonderful the government is and how we don’t have to think for ourselves–books will be on audiotape with a free tape player of course.

8. A chosen career path so that the child will not have to worry about what they want to be when they grow up.

See then we won’t need parents or brains or decision making ability or anything–the government can just take care of us forever and we will all be equal and we will all love each other and we will never have any pain or tears or discomfort or….

Okay, the only drawback is that our tax rate will of course need to increase to 85% of total earnings–which is fine because the government will be giving it all back anyway.  This type of system works wonderfully–just ask Russia or China orthe former Poland or the former East Germany or Cuba.  Also–since the government will be doing all the thinking for you–your opinion cannot be expressed in any form unless such form is approved by the government–which is only fair if you think about it–which you can’t because your not allowed to.

Maybe I’m being a little extreme–but seriously–either she is completely derranged or she truly wants America to become a Socialist Country–either way it is a scary proposition.  Hillary, how about taking the government out of the parenting business and allow people to make their own choices.  The government is not the moral compass of the American family–if a set of parents chose to save for their child’s education (if they can) then that is there choice.  Senator Clinton: if you want to help the babies of this Country and their parents–cut the government in half and cut our taxes in half at the same time–that would give money and decision making back to those who should be able to decide how to spend it–the ones who actually EARNED it!!!!