Archive for October 2010

Happy Election 2010 Halloween!

October 29, 2010

What better way to scare you than to imagine 2 more years with these Goblins?

OMG-I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Eric_Holder_is_a_Thug.jpg Eric Holder is a Thug image by B_Oceander 

I like this one better…

The scariest of them all.

-Murphy

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Vote “NO” on Proposition [Fill in the Blank]!

October 27, 2010

 

I have no idea what “propositions” or “resolutions” or “amendments” are added to your ballot in your jurisdiction.  In Houston there are three propositions.  One is to add some sort of “untouchable” fund for road improvements–which contains a myriad of hidden taxing possibilities for the future.  One is to allow red light cameras to enforce red light laws.  I voted NO for all propositions and encourage you to do the same.  Here is my guide for when you should vote “no.”

1.  When the Proposition/Resolution/Amendment Allows for MORE Government Intrusion Into Your Life.

If the item you are voting on adds more regulation, more oversight, added enforcement, a new government office, commission, committee, or office–then vote “No.”  The Government is involved in our lives enough.  Unless we want to start calling this Country the United Socialist States we must stop allowing these laws to get passed under the radar on the bottom of a ballot in an election.  They are always worded so ridiculous also:

Vote For or Against the following:  “To allow the government the ability to help all of its citizens, especially nuns, drowning babies and little baby owls, to better accomplish the American dream by creating a simple nondescript office of officials who would willingly lay down their lives for the betterment of the community and will require the simplest of forms and applications to obtain such help.”

Um…..NO!

2.  When the Proposition/Resolution/Amendment Allows for the Creation of Some Fund or Account and Otherwise Erodes the Balance of Power or Checks and Balances Inherently Built Into Our Form of Government.

If the item you are voting for creates a new tax, a new fund, a new rainy day account, a new savings, a new set aside, or a deregulation of the government’s ability to generate such money by taking it from you or your business or your property—then vote “No.”  If the Government needs more money, maybe it can get it by ending its hundreds of millions of dollars in subsidy to NPR or some other worthless social enterprise instead of taking it from us.  Be aware of these provisions:

Vote For or Against the Following:  “To amend the State Constitution which was drafted by conservatives back in the dark ages who could not foresee the unbelievable greed and irresponsibility of liberal politicians who, for decades, have been taking public money and funneling it into programs that were created for the ultimate goal of “purchasing” votes in future elections.  The new amendment will allow your State to create a rainy day fund to set aside $1 gazillion from “current” funds to pay for such items as police, fireman, roads, bridges, and education.  And it will allow the State to pull such money from existing tax dollars or, in the unlikely event it is necessary, add a new tax to ensure this fund never dries up.”

Um…Vote NO!

3.  When the Proposition/Resolution/Amendment Adds a New Regulation to “Help” Us.

The last major category are those propositions that create a new law or regulation designed to help all of the poor idiots who cannot help themselves, otherwise known as the citizens of the United States.  Do not vote for these:

Vote For or Against the Following:  “A new law that will allow local and State and Government and World Government and Obama Secret Police to arrest or detain anyone that is doing anything stupid that they should otherwise not be doing.  This law is all-inclusive and incorporates the following:  eating sugary foods, driving late at night, screaming at a rude store clerk, smoking, watching horror movies, riding on an airplane when you have a cold, being offensive, having an opinion or simply disliking someone.”

Vote (for the love of humanity)–NO.

-But by all means–get out there and VOTE!  Unless you’re a liberal, then feel free to cash your entitlement check and stay home for the day–you’ve earned it.

-Murphy

Countdown To Conservative Victory-For Your One-Click Convenience

October 19, 2010

Simply Click Below to See How Much Time is Left!

http://www.7is7.com/otto/countdown.html?year=2010&month=11&date=2&hrs=19&ts=12&min=0&sec=0&tz=local&lang=en&show=dhms&mode=r&cdir=down&bgcolor=%23CCFFFF&fgcolor=%23000000&title=Countdown%20To%20The%20End%20of%20Tyranny

You’re Welcome.

-Murphy

ALERT:President Obama is Messing With College Football!!!!

October 18, 2010

Well it seems that Democrats running for office are first running away from President Obama.  Recent articles on poll numbers suggest that everytime the President campaigns for a candidate, his/her numbers either stay the same or fall.  It would appear that his ability to cheer on his own party is not making the crowd cheer with him.  Democrats were warned when they voted for Obamacare that the voters would not forget.  Democrats were warned when they took over GM, suggested that CEO’s should have a government imposed salary cap, that people should be forced to keep their house temperature above 74 degrees that the voters would not forget.

Democrats seem to have forgotten that the Constitution (although severely watered down) is still taught in school, that many people still believe that freedom is better than Government enslavement.  Democrats have forgotten that many people know that when the Government runs something, it is run into the ground.  We have all been to the DMV, we have stood in line to obtain vehicle registrations and passports and building permits and business licenses–we know how well the Government runs things.

But Mr. President–please for the love of all that I have left to enjoy-stay away from college football.   When the President speaks somewhere, his ability to turn a race into a loss is starting to become viral.  This weekend he planned to visit and did in fact visit the campus of Ohio State University.  He scheduled the speech on Sunday but look what the mere planning of his arrival did to the game on Saturday:


1st 2nd 3rd 4th Final
 Ohio State 0 3 7 8 18
 Wisconsin 14 7 0 10 31

Ohio State was #1 in the Country and then the President announces a visit to the campus and then bam! 

So PLEASE President Obama, I would like to ask that if you have any scheduled trips to visit the University of Texas at Austin that you cancel them immediately–Don’t Mess With Texas!

-Murphy

P.S. Psssst….President Obama–I hear that Texas A&M has a fabulous conference center and would warmly welcome a visit from you sometime around say…Thanksgiving.

CNN Has Officially “Jumped The Shark”

October 7, 2010

For those of you born after 1978 or so, this is a phrase attributed to the demise of the hit show “Happy Days.”  Above is the scene from the show where “the Fonz” agreed to take on the challenge of jumping a pinned up shark in the water.  This episode is largely credited with the show’s desperate attempt to revive its ratings–to no avail.  Therefore, the term “Jumping the Shark” is often given to television shows that try some desperate story line to revive ratings.  In this case, it would appear that the entire network at CNN is “jumping the shark.”

Take a look at this hideous attempt to make what I suppose is a “news” show:

Yawn!!!  And Parker is no better.  “Well it is Halloween.”  This is horrid.

I think it is amazing that a guy can break the law by hiring a prostitute for sex, while married, while holding a high political office and then get his own cable news show.  There are over 300  million people in the United States–but CNN has hired this person to save its ratings.  Wow!

Seriously–this guy?

I feel kind of bad for CNN, even the prostitute said he is boring and looks like a “Gremlin.” Here at MKCB, we don’t want to be accused of being some pawn for Fox News, so I have some suggestions for other news hosts they may want to consider.  Keeping in mind their standards of integrity, morality and talent, here are my suggestions to replace Spitzer when he is eaten by that shark he is jumping:

1.  Hugh Grant

He was caught with a prostitute, charged with a crime, is semi-famous.  He is hideously boring in films and seems to fit the profile CNN wants.  Plus, he has way more hair than Spitzer.

2.  Barney Frank

Congressman Frank has been reelected numerous times since his prostitution scandal broke in the 1990’s.  It was a male prostitute, but that shouldn’t matter to CNN.   His ability to speak clearly is low and his qualifications to report the news fairly and honestly is right up to CNN’s standards.  He is also more charismatic than Spitzer–plus, it gets him out of Congress–which is good for America.

3.  The Guy That Married a Dog

 

A couple of years ago I ran a blog post about this man who married a dog as some sort of weird punishment for having mistreated a dog.  I think he is exactly what CNN needs.  It incorporates so many different and unique aspects of living and gives the network an all-inclusive viewpoint.  Plus, he is some kind of jokester.  He is always saying how his dog is better than a woman because, “she doesn’t complain when he drinks too much, and she never wants to go shopping, etc…”

4. Wanda Holloway

Remember her, the cheerleader mom?  She hired a hit man to kill the mother of her daughter’s rival cheerleader.  That is so perfect.  Look at her, she’s classy looking, from Texas, involved in a scandal that spawned a TV movie and tons of media coverage.  She is perfect!   She is off probation from her release from prison in 1997 and ready to handle the grind of cable news. 

I think that is enough, honorable mention might be Paris Hilton, Pee Wee Herman, Gary Hart, etc…

I might even have to watch this show if I could just recall the CNN’s channel number.  What is that……..?

-Murphy

“Democrats Gaining Ground” and Other Ridiculous Notions

October 5, 2010

Despite a report today on Gallup that Republicans will likely win big next month, despite weeks of poll numbers showing Democrats losing in numerous races across the Country in National, State and Local elections, despite all of that data and the common sense of every living person in the Nation, I was stunned to open my home page at msn.com this morning to find an article making the claim that Democrats are gaining ground in various polls.

Let’s review the tactics to win this election by the Democrats since March:

1.  Republican’s ideas are the same as Bush’s ideas and those are the “failed policies of the past.”

2.  Republicans are desperately trying to demonize the President because he is decisive and is bringing about change that is good for our Nation.

3.  Republicans are racists.

4. Republicans have given in to the fringe right of the Tea Party and want to take us back to the age of slavery, put women back in the home, outlaw abortion and feed their rich friends while stomping on the poor.

5.  Republicans are racists.

6.  The economy is Bush’s fault, who was a Republican, and but for Obama, we would be way worse off–like way, way.

7.  Republicans are elitists, bigots, homophobes and oh yeah, racists.

and now….

8.  Democrats are gaining ground and Fox News has been falsely hyping Republican victories, which are way over-exaggerated–like way, way.

This is the most amusing tactic yet.  Instead of telling America why Democrat philosophy is better for us than Republican philosophy, or telling us what their plan is for actually fixing the economy–they are simply trying to smoke screen the truth–yet again.  Unfortunately for Democrats, the truth is all to evident in this new information age with easy access to Rasmussen polls and Gallup polls online.  Sorry, Democrats, but you are still losing.

The idea that Democrats might actually not lose a tremendous number of incumbents in November is about as true as the following metaphorically similar statements (you may notice each of these came from the same person–can you guess who?):

1.  The Health Care Bill Will Not Increase The Deficit By One Dime. (thank goodness)

2.  The Healthcare Package Will Pay For Itself. (that’s cool–so it’s like installing better windows for your house–so that in say 500 years, you will have made up the cost in the tiny savings each month in your electric bill–okay, great)

3.  We Have Run Out of Places in The US to Drill For Oil.  (I figured all of those oil rigs in West Texas were just landscape art–I knew it)

4.  I Will Not Rest Until The BP Oil Spill Stops.  (I thought he looked really tired when he played golf those um, 7 times).

5. I Have Visited All 57 States.  (So, I called Continental Airlines and asked for their flight routes to the other 7 States and they said I was crazy–Thank Goodness they are merging with United–hopefully they have routes to those places.)

6. My Church Is Like Any Other Christian Church. (I guess my church isn’t a Christian church after all–my heavens, what have I been worshiping!!!!????!!!)

Seriously!

-Murphy