Obama’s Mother’s “Punishment” May Be On To Something.

 

Well, by now every Pro-Life and conservative blog has written about this–and typical of me, I’m weighing in a little late.  Our beloved Democratic nominee for President–you know the one that has an African heritage but despite his claims to the contrary is not a descendant of slaves–he stated yesterday that he would not want his daughters to be “punished with a baby or an STD” if they made a “mistake.”  (Click this link–great conservative site)

 See for yourself:

So, one thing is clear, when the magic man starts speaking off of his canned well written speech, he gets himself into trouble because his true ultra-left wing positions become more clear.  Notice how quickly he corrects himself when he accidentally says “Abstinence only”–ha ha ha.  But I digress…

Obviously Barack Obama, despite his strong Christian values as taught to him by Rev. Wright, is Pro-Choice and always has been.  But let’s look a little deeper into his idea that the Government should take an active role in protecting teenage girls that decide to have sex.  And please folks–let’s leave the moral discussion about pre-marital sex aside for the moment–I can only tackle one issue at a time after all I am a MAN!

What if the Government provided Super-Condoms and other Devices to protect us from other “punishments?”  Wouldn’t that be great?  For Example:

1.  DRUNK DRIVING

Is this fair?  Should we have to live with the “punishment” of innocent victims, mangled limbs and a wrecked vehicle just because we decide to “have a little fun?”  After all, if I make a “mistake” I don’t want to be “punished” with a record, guilt for those I’ve injured and a wrecked vehicle.  Maybe instead the government could mandate that we drive our cars around in giant condoms the size of balloons:

That way we would be protected from such nonsense.  Or…

2.  FREEBASING COCAINE

Is it fair that I should have to suffer the “punishment” of life-long burns and the gulit of killing others and maybe burning down a low-rent apartment complex simply because I made the “mistake” of freebasing a little cocaine once in a while.  I mean seriously–that seems harsh.  So maybe, since we know people are going to do drugs anyway, the Government could mandate that if you live in a poverty-ridden, crack-house infested neighborhood filled with people living on welfare and Government entitlements that you always wear a fireproof suit.

That way you will never get burned–and everyone else in the complex will be safe too because they will all have to wear them 24/7.  Or… and really this is my best idea…

3.  ELECTION RESULTS CONDOMS

This would take some serious engineering.. but…

Since it is possible that the mind-numbed liberals in our Country may actually elect a radical left-wing socialist whose wife hates the very Country she wants to assist in leading, we need election condoms.  They would have to be big.  Big enough to protect us all from the “punishment” of making a HUGE mistake.  That way, 6 months after he takes office and starts trying to raise capital gains taxes, explode government spending and entitlements, tax the “rich,” and flub his first 10 foreign crises, then we can “whip out” the election condom and protect ourselves from the remaining 3 1/2 years.

Obama–maybe you are on to something here… (wake up America!)

-Murphy

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