Archive for April 2008

Response To Rev. Wright-I Simply Can’t Take It Anymore

April 29, 2008

Ahh, Rev. Wright, what a guy.  He has really outdone himself in the past few days, saying that the “attacks” on him are actually on the “black church.”   He has suggested that he is not Obama’s spiritual mentor by calling such a reference “voodoo.”  He stands by his ridiculous position that the HIV virus was invented by the U.S. Government as a way of eliminating minorities.  (I guess the numerous white americans with Aids are just collateral damage).

He discussed how white people clap on the 1 and 3 beat of songs and black people clap on the 2 and 4 beat–Wha?  He made numerous references to how every aspect of our culture is dominated by “white culture.”  I guess he hasn’t seen the Billboard charts or the slew of professional athletes that are minorities or the amazing acting of people like Denzel Washington and Halle Berry, I suppose he hasn’t noticed that there are minorities on the Supreme Court, in numerous major offices in this Country like, Mayor of Philadelphia, New Orleans, Detroit, Atlanta and numerous others.

So what in the heck is wrong with this guy?  Well, oddly, Rev. Otis Moss, his replacement seems to have some of the same problems:

Wow, so apparently Rev. Wright and Jesus are very similar.   Wow!  Something must be wrong here.

The website for the Trinity United Church of Christ says “Black theology is one of the many theologies in the Americas that became popular during the liberation theology movement. They include Hispanic theology, Native American theology, Asian theology and Womanist theology.”  Womanist theology????  You know what that is—it is a theology that focuses on the suppression of Black Women primarly by White Women.  Very inclusive. 

So we are to believe that as a white Eurocentrist we simply do not understand that Black people are different, and worship differently and have a different theology.  Does this sound like the type of “Change” we need to “unite us all,” that Obama keeps talking about?  And yet, Obama continues to defend this man and this church.

This type of rhetoric is exactly what causes and fosters racism in our communities.  For years, America was guilty of segregating Black Americans because of their skin color.  Rev. Martin Luther King said, ” I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit together at the table of brotherhood.”  But of course, we can’t do that according to Rev. Wright, because the white man simply doesn’t get it.

Rev. Wright, You are not Jesus, you don’t even come close.  You can continually spew your hindsight driven explanation for your vile comments and attempt to convince us all that you are not a hate-mongering, Anti-American, divisive racist.  You can continue to say that your words were “taken out of context” or were simply small “snipits being looped over and over” and were therefore misunderstood.  You can continue to say that you are a patriot and that you love our Country all the while calling our military Roman Soliders and stating that the war is based on a lie.  You can continue to state that the US Government has a goal of suppressing and even murdering African-Americans simply because they are black.  You can do all of that because you ARE a free man, you have the right to speak your mind, you have the right to act the part of a fool, but…

WE WILL NOT BELIEVE IT!  We will chose not to be ignorant.  Because as a famous black preacher said many years ago, “Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”  You would do well to take heed to Rev. King’s words.

-Murphy

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An Early Tribute To Mother’s Day-Sort of!

April 25, 2008

As you know, May 11, 2008 is that Hallmark “holiday” we know as Mother’s Day.  Don’t forget about it–your mother is the reason you exist (partially) and therefore deserve at least one day a year to be honored.  Where did this hysteria come from anyway?  Where did this idea to have a day that if you forget about it, you will be riddled with guilt trips for 364 solid days following?  (that was good grammar)

Anyway, as I sit here with my shirt untucked, my bed unmade, my hair uncombed and fresh from a brisk run with scissors where I talked to strangers and pet dogs I didn’t know, I thought I should take a little time to think about this upcoming day of fun and excitement.

Where did it come from?  One site says the following:

In the times of the ancient Greeks, Rhea, the Mother of the Gods,  was honored with a special festival. In seventeenth century England, “Mothering Sunday,” celebrated on the fourth Sunday in Lent, honored England’s mothers.

Jumping across the ocean, the first observation of a Mother’s Day in the United States took place in 1872 when Julia Ward Howe, social reformer and poet who penned the words to the “Battle Hymn of the Republic,” suggested a day to honor mothers. This day, which she felt should be dedicated to peace, was celebrated by gatherings that she organized and held in Boston.  In 1907, Anna Jarvis took Howe’s idea a step further and began to campaign for a nationally recognized Mother’s Day.  On 9th of May 1914, President Woodrow Wilson made the official proclamation that Mother’s Day would be a national holiday to be celebrated annually on the second Sunday in May.

So there you have it–a little history of the day.  Now, to get you in the spirit, let’s talk about some famous mothers:

1.  HILLARY CLINTON’S MOM

Dorothy Emma Howell Rodham. Yes, she also has four names just like her daughter–its a thing in her family dating back to one of their great ancestors, Josef Gustav “Jack” Stalin.  (okay-I made that up).  She was a woman who was marred to a “rough and abusive” man named Hugh Rodham.  She has rarely given interviews and when asked about her daughter running for President she said “I know she will do great.”  One has to wonder if Hillary has kept her out of the spotlight for her own good or because her mother has no degree, never worked outside the home, and may not be the feminist Hillary portrays.  Hmmmm….In any event, I give kudos to her.  Anyone that could live with Hillary for 18 years is obviously a saint. 

2.  BARACK OBAMA’S MOM

Stanley Ann Dunham.  Yes, her name is “Stanley.”  Very little has been said about her during the campaign except that she died in 1995 of cancer and that she is white.  But what else do we know about the woman who shaped the man of “hope” and “change?”  Well according to the Chicago Tribune–for one thing she was an athiest.  That’s right, his original father was Muslim, his mother was athiest and what of his stepfather?–Haven’t been able to run that down yet.  But we all know that Obama is a Christian, gaining his perspective on life and religion from Rev. Jeremiah Wright.  (oohhh, sorry–I just felt a cold chill).  She was named Stanley after her father who really wanted a boy.  Nice!  Her friends describe her as saracastic, non-conforming and angry.  Obama said this about his mother in a recent interview: “the dominant figure in my formative years. . . . The values she taught me continue to be my touchstone when it comes to how I go about the world of politics.”

The “touchstone?”  Non-conformity for the sake of rebellion?  Athiesm?  yeesh!  Well, I suppose she should get kudos for walking around the world with the self-proclaimed messiah of change and the fact that she had to live with her name.

Hmmm… Maybe I’ve chosen the wrong mothers to make a point.

Well, In any event, don’t forget about yours–she helped make you and shape you.  She may have given you the occasional bad advice or guilt trip–but all in all, you literally owe your life to her–so take 1 day at least out of your busy schedule and honor her.  It’s a Commandment after all.  And remember–you could have ended up with Dorothy or Stanley.  Worse, you could have ended up with one of these:

-Murphy

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Polygamy Sect in Texas-Another TV Movie in the Making

April 21, 2008

Texas:  Okay, I’m a life-long Texan.  Yes, I’m “one of those.”  I think Texas is big enough, strong enough and wealthy enough to be its own Country–and in fact–at one time it was.  In fact, did you know that the Texas Flag is the only State flag that can be flown at the same height as the US Flag?  That is because Texas was once a Republic.  After all, 2 out of the 12 years of school in Texas, a child is taught “Texas History” during history class—the entire year!  We love our State, we are proud to be here and we wouldn’t live anywhere else.

But…

It seems that Texas continually acts as the stage for ridiculous events that always end up as TV movies with parts played by Farrah Faucet, and that woman from Who’s the Boss?  We’ve had Waco, Cheerleader Moms, Moms drowning kids, wives running over their husbands with SUV’s, racially based horrific murders, and the Texans football team.  Part of this is because Texas is so dadgum big.  Part of this is because Texas is so diverse.  And now, instead of Utah, the logical place for this kind of shennanigans, Texas is once again spotlighted for the strange and bizarre.

This morning the Early show interviewed some of the Men from the Polygamist compound in Texas–and let me tell you, the interview was mesmerizing.  I mean look at them–they are very charasmatic individuals.

The guy in the middle actually said that some of the “members” didn’t know that it was illegal to have sex with a girl under the age of 17 if you are an adult but that they are rethinking that now in light of this new revelation on the law.  Well good for you buddy–welcome to the last 500 years.

This entire thing is just too weird.  Now we have the state of Texas taking all of these children and putting them in foster care–because that has never been a system filled with abuse.  And the moms continue to appear in public like this:

So what is the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints?  Well, sorry Obama–it is not a gun-toting group of people clutching to religion because of their disenchanment with the Bush administration. No, it is a split from the mainstream Morman church that renounced polygamy a while ago.

It was run by this guy:

Warren Jeffs.  But of course, he resigned in November 2007 after spending years on the FBI’s top 10 most wanted list and finally getting sentenced to 10 years in prison for–you won’t believe it—two counts of being an accomplice to rape.  I know–shocking.  He is known for making the following quote:  “The black race is the people through which the devil has always been able to bring evil unto the earth.”

Nice Guy–Obama–I would not spend any campaign money on these guys–just a little FYI for ya.

What is really funny to me is how this organization makes its money–according to Wikipedia (the obvious source of all things accurate)–they have sold airplane components to the ….  United State Government… (ha ha ha) from 1998 to 2007 and made well over $1.7 million in that time period.

So what are some other things you may not know about the polygamist sect in Texas?  Well our team of reporters has investigated the scene and determined the following facts few knew about these wonderful people:

1.  All kids younger than 17 are also their own Grandpa.

2.  Laura Ashley has her own booth at the compound.

3.  Men have reported increased stress due primarily to dinner decisions.  When asking his wives where they would like to go to eat–all of them say “it doesn’t matter” which he knows is a freakin’ lie.

4.  Women have reported depression due to their combined husband finally blowing and telling all of them that “Yes, you look fat in that dress.”

5.  Oddly, the only movie star to “come out against the Government” so far regarding the raid is Woody Allen.

6.  Kids like to tell stories about their superhero, Morman Man, who flies around the world trying to find the most gullible women and bring them back to be abused and enslaved.

7.  The compound is saddened each year because they are not allowed to participate in an El Dorado annual event called the Running of the Bull. This event’s purpose is celebrating the “gift of gab.”  (El Dorado is soooo exciting).

8.  Many of the women in the Sect actually stop having babies at 35.  Why?  Because 36 is just too many.

9.  They have cool rules like this one:   After you bathe, don’t admire yourself in the mirror. Stay in the shower just long enough to clean yourself. Then dry off and GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM into a room where you will have some member of your family present.

Not a problem–I never admire myself in the mirror either before or after I bathe.  I do take long showers though–but that is because I typically fall asleep in there because I’m nearly 40.  I’m not sure why you have to get out of the bathroom so quickly–but none of my kids want to see me running around the house in a towel.

and finally,

10.  They all secretly hate the Osmonds.

 

Well, I’m with ya there brotha!

-Murphy

Making the Wrong Hand Gesture Can Land You In Jail

April 17, 2008

Austin, Texas–Attorneys are constantly getting a bad rap in society.  I should know, I am one.  Funny thing is–nearly all of my friends are not attorneys.  That is because, simply, I typically don’t like them.  No offense to my colleagues, but I rarely enjoy the company of a group of barristers.  We are ego-maniacs, pretentious, rude, self-absorbed, and not fun to hang out with.  Sure, there are plenty of us who are not like that but as a group, some of our stereotypes are well deserved.  Then something like this happens to really confirm our arrogance:

Adam Reposa-on the left , an Austin Lawyer was sentenced to 90 days in jail on a contempt of Court charge.  The reason?  He simulated a lewd gesture in front of a judge.  No, not the one-finger salute (although that is also illegal in Texas–truly) but he, in response to what a prosecutor was saying, moved his hand up in down while positioning it in a way that looked like he was holding a, er, um, a thick pencil.

But this should’nt surprise anyone.  Apparently Reposa has a history of being an idiot.  Check out a blog story about him from March.  Yes he has an ad where he calls himself the DWI STUD.  Now that is funny.  Here it is:
Can you read what it says? Here, I’ll help (this picture has been edited in my continued efforts to make this blog PG at worst):

“Check out Austin’s hottest DWI TAPES from cases where people were found NOT GUILTY. There are lots of DWI LAWYERS in town, but how many TAPES do they have? Who can put it down in the courtroom, and make them take it like he wants? BULLETPROOF, THE DWI STUD That’s who…You’d be a fool not to check out this man’s body of work. Watch him perform and then, you decide who you want.” (reprinted from the blog mentioned above)

Wow!  Seriously disturbing.  Well, he may be the DWI Stud, but he is not the Contempt of Court Stud–a visiting Judge sentenced him to 90 days in jail for his lewd gesture.  Ahhh, sweet justice.  I guess BULLETPROOF won’t be marketing his tape of this proceeding.  And of course, our image isn’t helped by shirts like this one:

Lawyers Do It

Is it fair to judge my profession by buffoons like this?  I mean there are a lot of very respectable men and women in my profession.  For example:

BILL CLINTON:  Well actually he doesn’t count because he has since been disbarred for lying under oath. Sorry, how about:

JONNIE COCHRAN:  Well, hard to argue that he was good–after all he was able to get an obvious murderer off.  And then there is:

STAR JONES:  Yes, Star Jones, the once large, now fit Star has a law degree.  Who knew?  Her commentary on The View was so non-revealing of this fact.  (Oh, how could I know that?  I’ve never watched the show–really I haven’t, I mean it)

Spiro Agnew

SPIRO AGNEW:  Yes the once VP to President Nixon (also a lawyer–also disbarred) was disbarred for bribery and tax evasion–now that is the funniest part–tax evasion–on someone who is part of the Federal government. 

Well, maybe this list is not a good look at the profession either (except for Star of course) but some of us are idealists.  Some of us do represent individuals because we like helping people and companies because we like making sure that the company doesn’t go bankrupt and all of its employees become unemployed.  Some of us take on cases now and then because we simply want to do what is right.

All in all many of us are honest, hard working professionals.  Why just last year a client came in my office who has been caught embezzling millions from his employer.  He asked me for advice and told me that he didn’t want to go to jail.  I told him “Don’t worry, you will never go to jail with all that money.  Sure enough, after a lengthy trial, he was sent to prison and by then he didn’t have a dime left.

🙂

-Murphy

UPDATE:  Here is the link to the Austin news story on the sentencing and his hillarious post-sentencing interview.  There is a great close-up of him being handcuffed.  I guess he “took it like they wanted.”

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Obama, A Good Man, An Elitist and Divisive, But a Good Man.

April 14, 2008

Well, the Democratic primary continues to entertain me more than watching reruns of Seinfeld for the 1000th time. (well nearly as much as that).  Obama, the man who is to bring about  “change” and bring ALL Americans together has really “stepped in it” as we might say here in gun-toting church going Texas.  Let’s see that quote one more time, shall we?

“You go into these small towns in Pennsylvania and, like a lot of small towns in the Midwest, the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing’s replaced them…And they fell through the Clinton administration, and the Bush administration, and each successive administration has said that somehow these communities are gonna regenerate and they have not.  And it’s not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.”

Ahhhhh, nothing as sweet as the sound of the truth coming out.  The truth about what this man really believes.  From babies being a “punishment” to his unashamed following of Rev. Wright’s anti-American racists rants to this latest slam against the “working-man.”  You know, the one that he is supposedly going to help by overtaxing the “wealthy” and giving tax breaks to these people.  And here is a liberal slamming the beloved glory-days of the Clinton administration–so rich!

And then there is Hillary–going on the offensive as she should with this quote:

“We have been working very hard to make it clear that we have millions of Democrats who are church going and gun-owning,” she said. “And we are tired of having Republicans, or frankly our own Democrats, give any ammunition to Republicans because what happens then is Republicans take advantage of the situation.”

She called the current imbroglio “an important moment for Democrats” and challenged Obama to further explain what he meant by his comments, which she reiterated were “elitist and divisive.”

Well done Senator.  Well done.  But she has to be ever so careful when slamming her opponent because after-all she cannot appear as a divisive racist.  So she followed that quote with this one:

Pressed on whether she truly believes Obama is an elitist, Clinton called him “a good man,” but recalled the narratives of the 2000 and 2004 president election.

“You don’t have to think back too far to remember that good men running for president were viewed as being elitist and out of touch with the values and lives of millions of Americans,” she said.

He He He Heeee!  This is almost better than wathing Donald Trump and Oprah Winfrey kill each other on MTV’s Celebrity DeathMatch.

In order to be “fair” however to Senator Obama we should look beyond the words and see if we can determine what group of people he will “include” in his all inclusive view of America.  We now know he doesn’t want the gun-toting Christians so that means we can exclude the entire State of Alabama from consideration.  Who does that leave in an Obama-visioned America?

What better way to discover who Obama intends to “include” than to find out who his “friends” are?  And what better way to discover his “friends” than to check out his MySpace.com page

On that page here is a sample of some of his “friends:” (These are actual photos from his “friends” page)

 

 

Okay, so I guess we have a picture now of an Obama-run American–very inclusive indeed.  I won’t tell you which ones where in his top 8. 😉

-Murphy

-“In a civilized society, one cannot send a severed cow’s head to anybody.”

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Jimmy Carter is The Long-Awaited AntiChrist.

April 11, 2008

SYRIA:  This just in—it appears that evidence is growing that would indicate that Former President Jimmy Carter is, in fact, the long awaited AntiChrist mentioned in Revelation.  This news has shocked the people of Georgia who remember Mr. Carter as a peaceful peanut farmer whose only real sin was a little lusting in his heart, and a hideous haircut.

The connection between this former leader and the son of the devil was made when he announced his intention to go toSyria and meet with Hamas leader Khaled Meshal.  Apparently the former Peace Prize recipient believes he has some ability to negotiate with terrorists.  The connection to the AntiChrist is really startling.

Our Biblical correspondent Rev. Streets R. Golden points out the amazing similarities in the Nobel Peace Prize winner and the Lord of Darkness:

“In Daniel we learn that the AntiChrist will rise for obscurity.  President Carter rose to power in the 1970’s from the obsurity of farming.” explains Rev. Golden. (Below is his home farm house)

  “We know he will come from the East and certainly Georgia is about as East as you can get.”  He continues, “He will speak boastfully and he will do as he pleases.  This buffoon thinks he can create peace in a region where the only thing that Hamas wants is death to all Jews and despite pleas from our Government, he will go over there and have dinner with the enemy anyway.”

“In Thessalonians we learn that the AntiChrist’s arrival on the world scene will be accompanied by miracles and wonders.  Well it is a miracle and a wonder that he continues to have any relevance at all.”

“He will hate his home nation and be worshipped by many.  Clearly this man hates America and what it stands for and the mindless robots that honor him with prizes and glory are essentially worshipping him.  And now by purposely going to the Middle East to meet with enemies of our Nation and Israel on “friendly” terms, it is clear that he is attempting to set up his new European kingdom from which he will rule.” explains Rev. Golden.

Well, as you can imagine this news has hit his home state the hardest.  We have sent a team to Plains, Georgia to ask the residents what they think of this terrible news.

Our team caught up with a couple of residents of Plains, Georgia who apparently (lucky for us) had the day off from work. 

Reporter: (To the man on the Left) “So Mr. Toomey..”

Toomey: “Oh hell, boy, call me ‘Dillweed’, that’s what my friends call me.”

Reporter:  “Ok Dillweed, what do you think about this terrible news that Jimmy Carter might be the AntiChrist?”

Dillweed:  “Well, I must say I ain’t that su’prized frankly.  I mean he married Rosey or whatever her name is and lookin’ at her I think it would take an AntiChrist to marry someone like ‘at.”

Reporter:  “Well, um, not to be too defensive, but Ms. Carter is a lovely woman, and…”

Dillweed:  “Boy, I think you might be 2 screws short of a full pair.  That O’Donnell lady is a lesbo.”

Reporter:  “What?…Well, How ’bout you sir (to the one on the right), how did you take the news?”

Tat-Man:  “You know son, you have a purty face.”

Reporter:  “Well thanks for your time.”

We sent our team to another location to try and get some real feedback on this developing situation.  We met up with another resident at a town Bar B Q, Ms. Henrietta Marfoon:

Reporter:  “Ms. Marfoon, what do you think about the fact that your hometown hero may in fact be the Father of Lies himself?”

Marfoon:  “Well truth be told, it’s kind of excitin’  I mean havin’ a President from Plains is one thing, but the AntiChrist?  Well now that is serious.  But enuff talk ’bout that, what say you and I grab some ribs–and I don’t mean the ones on the pit over there?”

Reporter:  “Well I’m flattered of course, but I have a job to do.”

Well it seems that the residents of Plains, Georgia are unaffected by this horrific and apocalyptic news.  Maybe Plains thinks it will be the New Babylon, maybe the residents of Plains haven’t had anything happen since the erected a giant Peanut in honor of President Carter.

Or maybe, just maybe, Jimmy Carter’s role in society is so irrelevant and so pointless that no one can honestly believe he is the AntiChrist.  We will continue to inform you as this story develops…

-Murphy

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UPDATE:  APPARENTLY ISRAEL HAS MORE BACKBONE THAT WE DO.  GOOD JOB ISRAEL–KEEP IT UP.

A Tribute to Charlton Heston for Obama and Hillary

April 7, 2008

As you no doubt know by now, we lost a great man this weekend, Charleton Heston.  Movie star, conservative, and a man not afraid to speak his mind.  I thought I would pull some of his own comments and weave them together into a final “interview” in honor of his legacy.  So, here we go…

Me:  Mr. Heston, welcome.  I am honored to get to speak with you today.  Was there any role in your many years you wish you had gotten to play?

Heston:  “I’ve played three presidents, three saints and two geniuses – and that’s probably enough for any man.”

Me:  I would say so.  Let’s talk about gun control–a subject to which you have dedicated much time and effort.  Remind us again what you said about being President of the NRA.

Heston:  I said a few years ago that “I intend to dedicate my remaining time as President of the NRA to ensure that the Second Amendment is safe from Al Gore and all those who threaten it.”

Me:  I love it.  Sadly you will not be here to see what the Supreme Court ultimately does with this issue in Washington D.C. but what do you think needs to be done to ensure our freedoms in this area?

Heston: ” A clear enunciation of these rights needs to be enshrined in the constitution to guarantee that this basic right of law-abiding gun owners and sportsmen shall not be infringed upon by anti-gun public officials.”

Me:  Amen to that. 

Heston:  Further, “As I have stood in the crosshairs of those who target Second Amendment freedoms, I’ve realized that firearms are not the only issue.  No, it’s much, much bigger than that.  I’ve come to understand that a cultural war is raging across our land, in which, with Orwellian fervor, certain acceptable thoughts and speech are mandated.”

Me:  Exactly–political correctness is everywhere.  In this Democratic primary campaign it is running rampant. (I hope I can say “running rampant.”)

Heston:  “Political Correctness is tyranny with a happy face.”

Me:  So true indeed.  If you had an opportunity to address Mrs. Clinton about your thoughts on gun control and politics, what would you say?

Heston:  I’d say the same thing I said to her husband when I said, “Mr. Clinton, sir, America didn’t trust you with our health care system, America didn’t trust you with gays in the military, America doesn’t trust you with our 21-year old daughters, and we sure, Lord, don’t trust you with our guns.”

Me:  Well, the part about the daughters probably doesn’t apply to her though…

Heston:  (smiling) (silence)

Me:  Well, what might you say to Obama?

Heston:  “I’m a seeker too.  But my dreams aren’t like yours.  I can’t help thinking that somewhere in the universe there has to be something better that [this] man.  Has to be.”

Me:  You would think so.  WIth 300 million Americans, I would hope that there are people here more qualified and better suited to run our Country.

Heston:  If he is elected I would cry out, “You may conquer the land, You may slaughter the people.  But that is not the end.  We will rise again.”  And anyway, if society is wounded by being crazy enough to elect Obama or Hillary well, “Society mends its wounds.  And that’s invariably true in all the tragedies, in the comedies as well.  And certainly in the histories.”

Me:   You know Obama claims to be about uniting our Country, yet he attends a racially bigotted church, his wife has written essays speaking of how much she wants to see a “black” America and he clearly wants to turn our Country in to a socialist State.  What can we do about this if he is elected?

Heston:  If he is elected my first question for him bluntly would be, “Are you a master builder or a master butcher?” and then I would scream at the top of my voice, “Let my people go!”

Me:  Have you run into any Democrats up in Heaven yet?

Heston:  HA HA HA, well of course not, but if I do I know exactly what I’ll say to them…

Me:  What would that be?

Heston:  “Get your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!”

Me:  Thanks so much for allowing me this opportunity.  We will all miss you.  Your life seems so rich and full, and we are truly blessed to have had your voice.

Heston:  “It’s been quite a ride.  I’ve loved every minute of it.”

-Murphy

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PS:  ALL QUOTED PORTIONS OF THIS POST ARE ACTUAL QUOTES FROM MR. HESTON’S PUBLIC AND MOVIE CAREER

 

Obama’s Mother’s “Punishment” May Be On To Something.

April 3, 2008

 

Well, by now every Pro-Life and conservative blog has written about this–and typical of me, I’m weighing in a little late.  Our beloved Democratic nominee for President–you know the one that has an African heritage but despite his claims to the contrary is not a descendant of slaves–he stated yesterday that he would not want his daughters to be “punished with a baby or an STD” if they made a “mistake.”  (Click this link–great conservative site)

 See for yourself:

So, one thing is clear, when the magic man starts speaking off of his canned well written speech, he gets himself into trouble because his true ultra-left wing positions become more clear.  Notice how quickly he corrects himself when he accidentally says “Abstinence only”–ha ha ha.  But I digress…

Obviously Barack Obama, despite his strong Christian values as taught to him by Rev. Wright, is Pro-Choice and always has been.  But let’s look a little deeper into his idea that the Government should take an active role in protecting teenage girls that decide to have sex.  And please folks–let’s leave the moral discussion about pre-marital sex aside for the moment–I can only tackle one issue at a time after all I am a MAN!

What if the Government provided Super-Condoms and other Devices to protect us from other “punishments?”  Wouldn’t that be great?  For Example:

1.  DRUNK DRIVING

Is this fair?  Should we have to live with the “punishment” of innocent victims, mangled limbs and a wrecked vehicle just because we decide to “have a little fun?”  After all, if I make a “mistake” I don’t want to be “punished” with a record, guilt for those I’ve injured and a wrecked vehicle.  Maybe instead the government could mandate that we drive our cars around in giant condoms the size of balloons:

That way we would be protected from such nonsense.  Or…

2.  FREEBASING COCAINE

Is it fair that I should have to suffer the “punishment” of life-long burns and the gulit of killing others and maybe burning down a low-rent apartment complex simply because I made the “mistake” of freebasing a little cocaine once in a while.  I mean seriously–that seems harsh.  So maybe, since we know people are going to do drugs anyway, the Government could mandate that if you live in a poverty-ridden, crack-house infested neighborhood filled with people living on welfare and Government entitlements that you always wear a fireproof suit.

That way you will never get burned–and everyone else in the complex will be safe too because they will all have to wear them 24/7.  Or… and really this is my best idea…

3.  ELECTION RESULTS CONDOMS

This would take some serious engineering.. but…

Since it is possible that the mind-numbed liberals in our Country may actually elect a radical left-wing socialist whose wife hates the very Country she wants to assist in leading, we need election condoms.  They would have to be big.  Big enough to protect us all from the “punishment” of making a HUGE mistake.  That way, 6 months after he takes office and starts trying to raise capital gains taxes, explode government spending and entitlements, tax the “rich,” and flub his first 10 foreign crises, then we can “whip out” the election condom and protect ourselves from the remaining 3 1/2 years.

Obama–maybe you are on to something here… (wake up America!)

-Murphy

WordPress.com Political Blogger Alliance

TOP 10 OBAMA AND HILLARY LIES!

April 1, 2008

I’ve missed blogging this week.  I’ve had to work hard again so that I can continue to make money for the government.  Especially this time of year when I get to pay taxes from last year and the first quarter taxes for this year all on the same day.  I guess its rice and beans for the next month.

So, there has been a lot of talk about lying the last few days.  If Letterman would have a TOP 10 list for Hillary and Obama, I think it would look like this:

TOP 10 LIES TOLD BY BARACK OBAMA:

10.  “I am African American.”  (See post by Laurie Kendrick)

9.  “I did not personally hear Rev. Wright’s speech.”  (But then later he said he did–is he John Kerry?)

8.  “I do not support terrorism” (what about the Weather Underground and William Ayers?)

7.  “That Questionaire is not mine…well its my signature, but….”  (okay-playing the conspiracy card a little early aren’t we?)

6.  “I am patriotic.” (see previous posts by Me)

5.  “I support opportunity and growth.”  (but recently said that raising the capital gains tax from 15% to 20 or even 25% really won’t have much impact on Americans.  Really?  ha ha ha ha ha)

4.  “I have the experience necessary to lead this Country.”  (community leader? lawyer? thanks for the compliment Obama–I’m both as well–but probably not fit to lead the US–you go right ahead and try)

3.  “I want to unite all of us.”  (“But don’t forget my grandmother is scared of black people”)

2.  “My father was brought here to learn by Kennedy.” (actually, his father came over as part of a program that the Kennedy’s contributed to–at a later time-nice try dude)

AND THE NUMBER 1 LIE OF BARACK OBAMA:

1.  “I AM NOT A LIBERAL.”  (That actually may be true as his ideas tend to lean more to socialism than liberalism)

TOP 10 LIES OF HILLARY CLINTON:

10.  “I wear a size 6 pants.” (seriously)

9.  “I was nearly shot in Serbia” (while being greeted by security and supporters and a freaking parade)

8.  “I was named after Sir Edmund Hilary” (the man who climbed Mt. Everest–problem is, he did that 5 years after she was born–ha ha ha)

7.  “Chelsea was jogging toward the towers on 9/11” (in a later interview Chelsea said she was in bed asleep on the other side of town when they were hit)

6. “I’m not some little woman standing by her man like Tammy Wynette” (wow!  sure seems that way)

5.  “When I was young I played pickup basketball”  ( I so wish I could photoshop something for this–UPDATE:  last week she declared that the 10-22 Michigan Wolverines should be the NCAA Champions-wha?)

4.  “I am an avid duck-hunter.” (she actually said this to some upstate New Yorkers–good try to get the NRA–but sorry Hillary, they hate your ever-lovin’ guts)

3.  “When I lived in Chicago I was a Yankees’ Fan.” (whatever)

2.  “I learned how to make money in the futures market from the Wall Street Journal.” (actually the Journal didn’t cover the futures market when she “made” her money in it.)

AND THE NUMBER 1 LIE OF HILLARY CLINTON:

1.  “I WAS INSTRUMENTAL IN THE IRISH PEACE PROCESS.”  (see previous post)

So with all of this lying going on–what is the message we are to glean from it all?  Is it simply okay to lie?  Should we use that as a method of getting ahead?  You say–I’m not a liar!  Let’s see:

 DO YOU EVER…

Do you ever . . . ?

– pretend to be some thing, or some one other than who and what you really are?

– smile, while hiding your true feelings about people, activities, or situations?

– say one thing while thinking something different or totally opposite?

– answer questions according to what you think the other person wants to hear, rather than the truth?

– express agreement just to avoid an argument?

– make promises which you do not intend to keep?

– say one thing aloud, while silently qualifying your statement to yourself?

– use an excuse to qualify a previous untrue statement?

– withhold certain facts and overemphasize others to lead your listener to your desired conclusion?

– omit the positive and emphasize the negative in order to obtain sympathy for yourself?

– pretend to “forget” or pretend to have “misunderstood” when it suits your purposes?

– blame others for your problems or mistakes?

– say anything other than what you are thinking out of fear of the consequences?

– use evasive answers to avoid telling the truth?

– accept only those who agree with you as having the truth?

– allege a noble reason for fulfilling a selfish desire?

– use unrevealed exaggeration to get or hold the attention of others?

– claim to want the truth when you truly want anything else?

– claim to be offended by liars and by lying, and yet you lie to others?

– condemn the lying of others, but relabel your lies with softer sounding names?

– accept and reject lies from others as it suits your personal interests?

– pretend that a lie is the truth merely because you want it to be the truth?

– hear only what you want to hear and ignore the rest?

– claim that an untruth is “for their own good”?

– claim that “the truth will do more harm than good”?

– place others in a position of having to choose whether to lie in order to spare your feelings?

– tell yourself that if it concerns something unimportant, then the truth doesn’t matter?

– tell yourself that as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, the truth doesn’t matter?

– tell yourself or others that some lies (xmas, easter bunny, social flattery) are better than the truth?

– practice denial?

– say anything other than the truth in order to manipulate others?

– pay insincere compliments in order to appear friendly?

– withhold critical information in order to appear more desirable?

– use unrevealed exaggeration to enhance your reputation?

Okay–I could go on and on–if you answered “yes” to any of these–congrats–you are a liar!  So therefore, we should not be so harsh on poor little Obama and Hillary right?

WRONG–there is a huge difference in excusing the lies of others and excusing the lies of someone who wants to lead the greatest Nation in the World.  Leaders are people that others follow.  Therefore, the single most powerful leader of this World must have integrity, honesty, compassion, determination, steadfastness, diligence, honor, self-sacrifice, boldness, and greatness.  None of these words are used to define a liar.  Higher standard?  You Bet!

-Murphy

WordPress.com Political Blogger Alliance